When You Talk With Your Child Before the Visit:

Published by admin March 1st, 2008 in Children's Health.
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  • Be open. No matter what their age, tell your children in advance when they are going to the doctor and why. They need to know what to expect. It helps even young children to know that a “shot” can protect them from getting sick or that a test will let the doctor know which medicine will make them well.
  • Be clear. The more you can offer a simple step-by-step description of the visit in advance, the better. Whether it’s a finger prick, a vaccine, or a strep test, don’t hold back basic information for fear of frightening your child. Children’s imaginations can fill any void with scary thoughts.
  • Be honest. Never say it won’t hurt if it will. Don’t say there won’t be a shot unless you are absolutely sure about it. If you lie to get through this appointment, you’ll have a much harder time going to the doctor with your child in the future.
  • Don’t be dramatic. There’s an important difference between saying “It will hurt for a minute” or “You’ll feel a pinch” and saying “It will hurt like crazy!” The expectation to feel pain can actually make the pain worse. Acknowledge that there will be pain or discomfort, but play it down a little.
  • Be positive. You’re going to see this doctor because he or she can take good care of your child. Your child needs to know that. The doctor wants to help children be healthy and strong. That’s true, and it’s good to let your child know it too. You may have a long-term, friendly relationship with this doctor, or you may never have seen him or her before. This is no time to appear unsure. Your child needs to know that you trust the doctor.
  • Be confident. You may be very worried about what will happen at the doctor’s office. You may be squeamish about shots and medical tests. You may be worried that the doctor will discover your child has a serious health problem. If so, tell your spouse or tell a friend. Don’t share your fears with your child. You may find that being strong and calm for your child will actually make you feel less afraid.
  • Act it out. For small children, a toy doctor kit and a little dress rehearsal can help ease worries before his or her grand entrance into the doctor’s office. Take turns being doctor and patient, taking blood pressure and temperature, looking in ears and eyes. When you are the doctor, praise your fine patient. Be a cooperative and polite patient when you’re on the receiving end.
  • Don’t pry. Assure your preteen or teen that he or she will be able to talk to the doctor, in private, about any concerns he or she may have. Tell your child that you will not become involved unless he or she (and the doctor) wants you to.

Excerpted from: Guide to Talking to Your Doctor, American Medical Association, 2001.