- Trust your judgment. Your doctor knows about children — but you know your child. Feel free to speak your concerns. If your child eats no vegetables or has terrible tantrums, admit it and get the help or reassurance you need. If there are serious problems at home that affect your child, say so. Your doctor’s primary interest is your child’s health and well-being.
- Ask any question, no matter how unimportant you think it may be to the doctor. This may be your first child or your third. Still, every child is different, and parents are constantly facing new concerns. Don’t hold back a question because you think the question is trivial or because you think you should already know the answer. Your child’s doctor will respect your openness and genuine interest in your child’s health.
- Make sure you understand every answer. Ask for an explanation if you don’t. Ask again if it still isn’t clear. If you want more in-depth information, ask for that, too. Your child’s doctor talks to many different parents who have different levels of medical knowledge. Let him or her know what you need to know and what your child needs to know. Doctors are used to explaining complicated medical problems and procedures in terms a child can understand.
- Don’t be shy about making suggestions. Speak up if you can help things go smoothly. Maybe your child wants to ask something. Maybe your child will sit still while ears and eyes are examined if he or she can sit on your lap.
- Encourage a one-on-one relationship between your child and his or her doctor. Encourage your child to ask and answer questions about his or her body. Your child will feel calmer and more cooperative if he or she feels a sense of control. A trusting friendship between a child and a doctor can be a valuable source of support and guidance in the years ahead.
- Make sure your teen has a general health assessment. Adolescents tend to go to the doctor less frequently than younger children do. Even if this is not your child’s first visit to this doctor or office, see to it that he or she gets a basic health checkup. If you can’t fit in an assessment at this visit, schedule one for the next appointment.
- Respect your child’s privacy. Teenagers, and sometimes preteens, need the chance to talk alone with a doctor or nurse. Encourage your child to feel he or she can say anything without getting into trouble or worrying about embarrassment. If there’s a private conversation between your teen and the doctor, it’s important not to pry
- Compare notes afterward with your child. Review the visit. Listen to your child. Be sure your child understands what happened. If it didn’t go well, tell your child it can be better next time. Praise any good behavior. Discuss misbehavior calmly.
Excerpted from: Guide to Talking to Your Doctor, American Medical Association, 2001.